The Sweet, yet Strange Relationship between the Surrogate and the Intended Parents!

The relationship between a surrogate mother and the intended parents is kind of sweet and strange at the same time. While the surrogate acts as a godsend for the intended parents, she also have to sign a contract in order to go by her role and the responsibilities. Intended parents, on the other hand, also enter into the agreement in good faith. Yet, given the uncertainties around a surrogacy program, they have to take legal counsel in order to safeguard their interests and rights during their surrogacy journey. In the following parts of this article, we will look in detail into all such aspects.

Intended parents and Surrogate: The sweeter side of the relationship!

Common goals: Right from the start, both the surrogate in USA and the intended parents are working towards a shared goal i.e bringing a new life into this world. The surrogate and intended parents are together into this shared journey and that gives their relationship a much sweeter angle.

Emotional Bonding: Both the surrogate mother in USA and the intended parents will once again share their surrogacy journey in numerous aspects. From attending doctor appointments, getting through the tests and diagnosis, feeling the baby's first kicks, and sharing progress reports, they get numerous chances to create that lifelong emotional bond.

Respect towards each other: For the intended parents, the surrogate in USA is no less than an angel. On the other hand, surrogate takes intended parents as someone who provided her with an opportunity to make a difference in their lives. Either ways, they have got numerous reasons to show love, gratitude and respect towards each other.

Intended parents and Surrogate: The stranger side of the relationship!

Defining Boundaries: During the surrogacy journey, both the parties sometimes find it tough to create a balance between interaction and personal boundaries. Such situation often leads to a kind of strangeness around their relationship. Moreover, the surrogate may or may not want intended parents around her all the time. So, she has to communicate the same at times, bringing a bittersweet element into the picture.

Contractual agreements: The entire relationship of the surrogate and the intended parents is managed via a contractual agreement. Hence, it sometimes brings a sense of formality between both the sides. Even though both the parties are in this together, they would take the other one as sheer legal association.

Social Perspectives: Social opinions on surrogacy in USA may sometime bring dark clouds over the sweeter relationship of the surrogate and the intended parents. While it all depends on the local communities and environment, the surrogate or either the intended parents may fall prey to it at times.

The cost aspect: The Surrogacy cost in USA is higher than other countries around the world. On the other side, the commercial aspect of it may sometime push the surrogate to demand higher remuneration. Also, she may ask for insurance cover and other related expenses from the intended parents. Such demands related to surrogacy cost in USA may create some differences between both the parties.

Gay surrogacy: In case the intended parents are opting for surrogacy for gay couples in USA, they may or may not be comfortable discussing their sexuality in front of the surrogate in USA. While the relationship between the two is a situational association, it may create a bitter environment around everyone.

For example, while going for surrogacy for gay couples in USA, the intended parents may meet the surrogate mother in USA once. During the conversation, the surrogate asks certain questions about why they want to opt for a kid being in a gay relationship. Or else she may ask random questions that may or may not offend the couples. Such conversations sometimes lead to even altercation or termination of the surrogacy contracts.

How to go about the relationship between both the parties?

Clear Communication

Both the surrogate and the intended parents need to ensure that a clear communication is established at every point in time. Whether something about the surrogate has offended the intended parents or vice versa, they must put it through in a clear manner.

On the other side, both the parties should agree on things that may or may not bring issues between them in the future course of the surrogacy journey. Besides, they must agree on facts that certain questions won’t be asked during the communication between them

Legal Clarity

Each and everything related to the surrogacy journey must be mentioned in the surrogacy contract. This way, no party would be able to create issues that may go against them in the overall process. On the other hand, the legal agreement would bind them to act in a certain manner during the future course of the surrogacy process.

Emotional Support

Both the surrogate and intended parents must opt for a psychological counselor during the surrogacy process. That way, they would be able to handle each of the bittersweet emotions in the best manner possible. Moreover, they would be able to take care of the entire relationship between them in a streamlined manner.

Final words

The relationship between the surrogate and intended parents is a perfect blend of sweetness and strangeness. Still, while going about it while respecting each other’s emotions, boundaries and personal space, one can achieve the desired results in their surrogacy journey.